Must try harder

So. That "blog more frequently" idea didn't do too well in June. I'll attempt to improve my record in July.

I'm currently in a bit of a confused place between total-panic-must-focus-and-get-cracking-on-this and bored apathy towards the task in hand. I should elaborate. The task is pulling together my notes and knowledge from reading papers around the subject of the research project that I've been lucky enough to be allowed to work on for two months over the summer.

The apathy, I think, has come from a drawn out process of finding out when I'll actually be starting on the project. It has been an almost imminent kick-off for nearly three weeks now - as has the pay I'll be getting for doing it. As an upshot I've been bumbling about at home, too skint to do anything much involving leaving the house and trying to do the research required of me before the project starts.

On the other hand I now know that I'll be beginning next Monday and that I have to give a formal presentation to the Medicines Research Group within which I'll be working on my findings so far and how I think the project should be tackled. This side of things has me in TOTAL PANIC. I hate doing presentations. They generally involve me turning into a human beetroot, not being able to breath and shaking and mumbling my way through an incomprehensible shamble of words. Too quietly at that.

I should be (and am a little) excited as it's a fantastic opportunity to practise before dissertation stuff next year and good lab experience for my CV, plus we may even get the report published in a real life journal! All good stuffs. I'm just feeling a little lost as direction given to me so far on what exactly is expected of me has been vague. Especially as I'm sure the MRG already have a pretty good idea of the method of experiementation they want to use as they've done similar routes of research before. I'm meeting informally with my programme leader tomorrow though so hopefully I'll be able to get some more useful pointers on what the hell I'm supposed to be doing then. Part of me thinks the vagueness has been a test to see if I'm sctually up to task. Fingers crossed I've avoided an "epic fail" moment here.

Wish me luck internet!